In the days of COVID 19

If you are a writer, you probably feel like I do. Finding the energy or the creativity to write during this time has been difficult. I was feeling this way before COVID due to some family stressors, but now I can’t make myself sit in a chair or pick up a pen, and my notebooks turn into journals instead of anything worth sharing.

I continue to give myself permission to “not” write, knowing that my muse will return and hopefully sooner than later. I always wanted to write. As a child, I had a toy typewriter. I’m pretty old so you may not remember. There was a round dial on top that you turned to get to the letter you wanted, before pressing the key. Talk about pecking out a sentence.

For my high school graduation I was presented with a new aqua blue Corona portable typewriter to take to college. I loved that typewriter and I’ve been trying to find one recently – just for the memories.

My degrees are in Education, English, Counseling and Secondary Administration. I held jobs in each of these capacities during my career. When I retired, the future looked pretty empty and I was nervous about filling my days. Out of the blue I happened upon an article about a creative writing certification program at my local community college and within minutes I phoned the department chair and was practically assured an acceptance letter once I applied. And from then on I wrote, and wrote, and wrote.

So it’s with a heavy heart that I sit at the keyboard or hover over a notebook only to find no words to put on paper.

How has this time been for you? Is it affecting your career? your personal life? your mental health? I’d like to hear from you. Because part of optimism is the ability to “sit it out and wait and know that the future is right around the corner.

Like many of you I grew up during the polio epidemic, then AIDS, Sars, and all the rest. My heart breaks for those who have lost loved ones and for those in ICU wards across the country. I guess my heavy heart is what is weighing me down.

My best to all of you. I pray that you have not been personally affected, and I pray that you too will regain your energy, positivity and abilities very soon. Like you, I wait.

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